I am an aquarian women in a difficult relationship after my husband cheated on me. We ahve not had sex for 3 years and I would like to leave him but afraid of huting him and our 2 8 year old children. Ihave been friends with a capricorn man for almost 4 years after his wife cheated on him. We gained each others trust and he has shared things with me to the extend that he cries and feels I am the only person he can do this with. 18 months ago his divorce came through after she cheated on him with a 16 year old boy, he has 4 children and she has been very volatile to him, running him down as a dad, their sex etc but then also toys with his emotins saying that he knows she will always love him etc the usual mind games and everytime he meets someone she tells him he cant introduce them to the kids etc but through all this time she has been seeing other people and enouraging theirchildren to call her partner dad. I feel so sorry for my cap friend. over hte past year, my husband has spent less and less time with me and one night i was feeling a little upset and about 8 months ago we kissed under the influence of alcohol. I have always been drawn to this cap man not jsut asa friend, I think it was because i was so amazed that after the crap his wife put him through he still loved her and his dedication amazes me. In May 2011 we kissed again but he started this, and several months ago we started sleeping together. He told me that he has never felt so relaxed and he loves the fact that i never criticise or expect anything other than who he is and although i told him im in love with him but still love my husband he never expected anything else from me and told me he never not wants me in his life and if things dont work out we must always be friends. He has shared that he hates his ex although i doutted that slightly, but loving him i started to believe him. Recently he asked if he could name me as his next of kin and sort out his insurance etc for his children if anything happens to them. this man has serious family problems and choose his wife after she got prgnant within 2 months of dating at 17 years of age so they married quickly and never bothered with his family since but the history was not good. His relationship with his wife was very violent and she battled to be in charge and he has shared that it was easier to let her treat him like nothing, she stopped him working away when a new job was offered as she made it difficult saying that he put work above her etc - you get the picture. Basically he told me he loved me and i loved hearing him say it, he would say it as we kissed, laying in bed not always but he said it without prompt and that made me happy. His ex wife got married on christmas eve and his children had text me to talk about it and i rang him and he sounded upset and said he needed to go. I had that feeling so I text and asked did I upset him talking about the wedding as we had always talked openly about it and he said that she would only land up cheating on him again (i do know that she had text my cap man and said that she would take him back if he wouldnt go on about the cheating etc, and she was with the new fiancee at this stage) he text me back saying that how do I think he feels the women he loves and wants is marrying another man and he married her on Dec 10th all those years ago - i was devasted and didnt expect that. I told him Y know if he felt that way he should have told her etc and he was like you would never understand. I thought ultimately im his friend he needs me, so i travelled 2 hours to see him thinking i would be there with him on Christmas eve just so he wasnt alone - He lives alone within his working environment and just moved in, we have recently been shopping and decorated the place ready for him the children and in preperation for christmas. When I arrived at his home, he said what are you doing here i want to be alone and he looked angry, i said I came so we could talk and you tell me how you feel i got whisky to kill the pain and tissues to dry your eyes, I want to help and he was having none of it saying i dont want to talk about it and wouldnt lift his eyes to look at me etc. He just sat watching tv, I waited a few hours then thought it best to leave. I said goodbye, i know where im not wanted and took the few things ihad in a cupboard there thinking as a women if he wants here, he wont want my stuff reminding him and left - i was so broken. I waved and tried to be as brave as possible. He text me saying i shouldnt have come and should have left him alone like he wanted (he didnt tell me that), he then asked why i took my stuff (i said coz u didnt want my stuff reminding you of us, when its not be you want) he told me im a joke - i retaliated saying you are the one who told me and others that you hate your wife and wish she was dead (although love and hate are string emotions, what a fool i am) and he text saying - i never asked or wanted u to come, once again you made ir about u, i will always love and want his ex wife however she treates me and thats my life so go back to your husband and have a good xmas and life. Im so angry its like all the hard work i done on building his confidence and developing his trust has gone and he still thinks he`s worth nothing. She is now married and i told him i went to see him because i cared and i said friends should have friends around them when upset, he said no thats a me thing and it`s always about me. (Whenever angry or upset in the past, he often blows up at me but i never lose my temper) He said i never ask how he feels and started talking about plans we made for new years with all our children saying i never asked him which isnt true - he can be very childlike when in misery mode. I text him christmas day as a generated message to everyone and on boxing day, i said i had thought about what happened and I should have known he wanted to be alone but in the past he always said whne down even though he is angry he likes me to be there as it helps him overcome things faster, but i appreciate this is different but hoped that he liked the presents and although i appreciate that this is a difficult time i wish him the best and told him that I hope he would one day forgive me and I would always be at the end of the phone nad he replied with It`s over between us and i`ve not opened them and I want you to leave me and the kids alone, i never want to hear from you again. (I had orior to this text stupidly wrote him a letter sayign i was sorry and it was because i panicked that i was losing him but it was because i cared as well and told him how proud i am of him and that he is a good person and deserves so much more in his life and must never think he is worth nothing - he prob aint had it yet) SIm really worried that as usual his anger is taken out on me. He has never been jealous of my husband so he says and they have spoken together and he comes occassionally and my husband knows we are good friends. He knows my husband has cheated on me several times both for long periods of time once for 4 years and once for 3 years which is half of my married life and he tells me I should leave but he knows as my daughter has issues, he understands. some of this stuff is personal, please dont publish dates or specific info. If i speak to other men etc, my cap friend dont really like it, he loves how confident i am with people, i can speak to anyone and always asks my advice for his work etc. I love him very much and his strength is giving me the confdience to cope with my home life although it`s him i prefer to be with. Complicated and long but do you think my cap man will forgive me, do you think we have a future and does he really love his ex wife and therefoer will never truly love me or was it becuase he feared that their end is over the moment she got married to another man. Do i text him, im angry and will let him. he once uspet me and told me we were over once before over something stupid about me buying a gift for his kids he told me not to get and he didnt text me for weeks, then he found out his kids still spoke to me and he text sayign leave them alone etc, but i wonder if that was still an excuse to text me to test if i still mattered to him. I sent an odd text to which i got no reply just stuff like hope your ok etc. After another 3 weeks he rang me out of the blue as someone upset him in work nad he needed to talk to me to air his frustration. Please help me in solving this situation, will i ever yreally be a partner for him or only ever a friend.